Friday, January 6, 2012

Resting in Him

When Aaron and I began trying to conceive (ttc) about 1 1/2 years after we were married I felt kind of lost.  I knew it probably wouldn't be an easy task.  It had taken my Mom some time to get pregnant with me, my cycles were wonky to say the least and everyone around me seemed to simply blink and they were expecting.  I turned to the internet.  I can't remember why, or who told me to, but I decided it would be a good idea to chart my cycles using a basal body thermometer.  I devoured this book.  By the way, as a side note...this book should be required material for any woman in her twenties whether or not she is TTC.  It is incredible.  Never have I learned more about how my body works.  I could tell you all my tricks of the trade, it for yourself.  It's a good one to have in your library.  I searched the internet and found a website called Fertility Friend.  I charted my cycle there as it was much easier than on paper.  Through that website I found Two Week Wait.  It was there I found a group of Christian women who were in the very same place that I was.  We all shared our faith and TTC.  Little did I know these women would be part of my life for years to come.  It's amazing to me how our Jesus brought us all together.  He orchestrated this perfectly.  The founder of the website Two Week Wait lives in Austin, do many other women in this very group.  We currently have a private Facebook group with 18 of the very same women that I began this group with some 6 years (I'm guessing) ago.  WOW.  These women have lifted me up when I've been so down.  They prayed me through infertility, the death of my Dad, three miscarriages and Elliott's graduation day.  They were the first people I told I was pregnant each and every time...except for Aaron of course!  They probably know more about me than most of my very close friends.  AND...I have only met TWO of them in person.  

When we flew to Texas to pick up our sweet Halle girl, Rachel who I only knew from Two Week Wait offered her home to Aaron, Halle and I. Wow.  I remember when she called me up and talked with me for the very first time.  I felt like I'd known her forever.  It was as if she was one of my closest friends.  And you know what?? She is.  During my pregnancy with Elliott and all the complications and his delivery she covered me in prayer.  I know without a shadow of a doubt she did.  She called many times during our crisis and just talked with me.  About Elliott, about his birth....asked me what he looked like.  Cried with me.  I love her and I've only spent one week of my life with her face-to-face. When we were in Texas I also met Elle, the founder of Two Week Wait who has Ella Bella Photography, and still a member of "Resting in Him".  She generously took amazing photos of Halle one of the first days she was placed with us.  When Elliott passed away this amazing group of women not only sent us flowers, but....two days later I received a box of GIGANTIC chocolate covered strawberries with a note simply saying...we all need some chocolate. one of my most treasured possessions.  This beautiful necklace made especially for me with not only Halle, but....Elliott's name as well.  If you are in a similar place in life that I was in I encourage you to reach out to others.  Find a place where you can share your struggles and triumphs.  Where others know what you are going through....a place like Two Week Wait.  More than that, I encourage you to be honest and forthright.  To share with your friends and family, if you feel comfortable doing so...let them know what you are going through.  It helps so much for them to know how to approach you.  More than that, I'm available if you need someone to e-mail or talk to. Leave me a comment here.  I honestly don't know how many or who reads my blog. I would love to "meet" you so to speak, pray for you and stand with you as you walk the unknown, most likely, bumpy road of trying to grow your family while dealing with infertility.  And to my Resting in Him girls...Yes, our Jesus knew what he was doing.  I'm so very thankful for each and every one of you.  
 Rachel (dark hair) with her son Hudson, Elle holding Hunter & her son Hayden next to Halle.
 One of the amazing photos Elle took of Halle.  I can't believe she was ever this small. Sigh.
Those GIGANTIC chocolate covered strawberries.
My necklace as Halle reads it...."Love, Halle & Elliott".  I say perfect.


Mama D.'s Dozen said...

I'm so glad that the Lord has given you such an amazing support group. Precious!

I, too, found an awesome group of ladies through the internet ... other mamas who are raising traumatized adopted children ... other mamas who understand the unimaginable challenges.

These women have not only walked me through our adoption disruption, and our ongoing challenges with our Little Miss ... but several of them have been by my side (through emails and phone calls) as I just walked through the absolutely most difficult year of my life.

Praising Jesus for friendships, whether near or far, who understand the power of prayer, of listening, of just being there for one another (and the comfort of chocolate covered strawberries).

You are BLESSED!


Delanie said...

April, this is so beautifully written! Jesus loves us so much. He certainly knew what he was doing when we joined tww.
I joined in July 2005 and at that time when Erin started it there were only 5 girls and no babies. Now there are 18 of us and over 40 babies with one on his way! God is so amazing and I am so glad that you glorify Him on your journey.

herent said...

Hello April hope you had a great New Years, we had a nice quiet one with just Jeremy, myself and the boys.
You definately are blessed to have found a support group of women to help you through infertility and growing your family. It's so hard to find people that really understand as infertilty can really tear you up inside. Jeremy and I are going on 2 years of ttc #3, I guess I just hoped we wouldn't have to struggle with infertility again after Rylee since we know about the PCOS. Well I guess the Lord has different plans as to how we will expand our family, it's so hard to give it all to God, when I just wish I could decide how big I want my family to be, when others around me seem to be popping them out left and right :)
I pray that you will be able to have as many beautiful healthy children as you could ever dream of.
Heather TenKley

Elle said...

We love you April!!! Beautiful post! :)

Life in a nutshell said...

I too, found an online support group 11 years ago and it was the best thing I have ever done. I have not met them face to face yet, but we also have a private Facebook group. I am thrilled to say I get to met one of the gals this summer. That group really lifted me when we had our miscarriages. They celebrated with joy when we brought home our kiddos. ((hugs)) to you both.